Back In The High Life Again

It's finally here. The glorious end to tax season. We get a half day today, which I will use to "do stuff" such as golf, play pickup basketball...maybe pickup a sixer of Mike's Hard Lemonade, troll some chat rooms, and see what the middle school girls are up to tonight.

Tomorrow our office is closed, so it's my own personal Shomer Shabbos, aka Peter Gibbons' Day, where I will do absolutely nothing all day long. The only decisions I'll make all day will be whether I get Sonic or Chipotle for lunch (who am I kidding, probably both) and which of the Star Wars movies I should watch (who am I kidding, probably all 6.)

Then on Friday I will celebrate with a few cocktails. By "a few" I mean "enough to bring down a small-to-medium sized Argentinian family." I plan on having a beer in my hand at 5:06 pm (5:03 pm if I hit all the lights on my way home) then getting Winnie the Pooh-drunk** and sleeping as late as humanly possible on Saturday. I don't think that 1 pm is out of the question. In fact, I'll be angry if I'm out of bed before noon. We'll put the over/under at 12:23.


**Winnie the Pooh drunk: getting so drunk that by the end of the night, I'm wearing a t-shirt and nothing else, and I'm elbows-deep in a jar of honey (or in my case, some spicy queso dip.)




Holler at your boy when you see him in the street.