Thursday, April 29, 2010

Run For The Roses


I am only a couple short hours away from embarking on what has become my favorite weekend of the year (which is probably about 83% due to the Derby being a truly amazing experience, and 17% because I haven't been to Vegas in...shudder, hand starts uncontrollably shaking....almost two years.)

One thing I like about the timing of the Derby is that with March Madness, The Masters, the weather being beautiful, the nationally-recognized 'Break Out Your Boobs In Public After A Long Winter' holiday, etc. etc., I don't drive myself completely insane by counting down the days for too long. Having said that, these last two or three weeks have been excruciating.

The horses I like, based entirely off of reading about 5 or 6 horse racing articles in the last couple days (which of course makes me an expert in my mind) are Jackson Bend and Super Saver. I should probably do more research and find out which horses are good mudders, because it's supposed to pour all day long on Saturday. But I probably won't, because "actual research" is not the strategy that has won money for me the last two years. (Also, if you happen to be taking bets on which horse has the best chance of collapsing and getting euthanized right there on the track, the smart money is on Devil May Care.)

As my longshot, I like Mission Impazible. I'm definitely putting money on that horse, if for no other reason than it gives me ample opportunities to drunkenly scream the Mission: Impossible theme song, and maybe even yell out Tom Cruise-related things during the race. Which, of course, is half the battle when gambling on horse racing. If I've taught you nothing else, at least remember that.

I don't have much else to say, really. My excitement clouds over everything, and I already used up my 'Red being released from Shawshank and getting ready to visit Andy Dufresne in Zihuatanejo' monologue before last year's trip. If you're bored on the interwebs today and need more cowbell, here are my stories from Derby weekend in 2008 and 2009.

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