>> Sometimes it's tough for me to remember that David Ortiz's career is currently falling apart, because in my MLB '08 season for the PS3, he's batting .326 with 29 homers and 91 RBI, and I'm not even at the All-Star Break yet. This sharp contrast between fantasy and reality makes his current situation all the more painful for me. Maybe Mom was right, video games are bad for me.
>> OK, OK, hold on. Wait. Wait. When, exactly, did Kate from Jon & Kate Plus 8 get hot? What the hell? I saw a couple pictures the other day and it blew my mind. Literally. My mind is blown. I mean, I thought I had actually seen her face, but apparently not. Normally, here's how the process works:
1. Alex flicks the channel to that show
2. I yell some obscenity regarding my feelings about Kate's personality
3. I explain, in graphic detail, what specific acts of domestic violence I would rain down upon her if I was Jon
4. I mutter under my breath, expressing my disbelief at some of the brutal shows my girlfriend watches (Jon & Kate, Chelsea Lately, Real Housewives of blah blah blah, etc. etc.)
5. I leave the room in disgust
So maybe I have never taken the time to actually look at the aforementioned Kate. I mean, if you get rid of the shitmop haircut of hers, she is a legitimate MILF. We need to work in a few "Kate goes on a day trip to a topless beach, hilarity/full frontal nudity ensues" episodes, and suddenly we've got a whole new ballgame. Forget TLC, we need HBO or Showtime to pick up this series.
And p.s., I am aware that the first bullet point of this post should probably discourage me from judging how Alex spends her free time. But somewhat unsurprisingly.....it doesn't.
>> Schne linked to this video in the comments section last time (listen on low volume, there's a couple of F bombs) and I finally just got around to watching it. I was DYING laughing. It hit especially close to home for me, because you would be hard-pressed to find a more accurate portrayal of my relationship with my brother. When we were younger, my family would drive cross-country to Baltimore every summer to visit extended family, and this youtube clip is the backseat dialogue of every one of those trips, condensed into 2 minutes and 43 seconds. (Sadly, in the video, I am represented by the dude on the top bunk. Of course I'd never admit it at the time, but basically every single fight Brother and I ever had during a road trip was my fault. Also in the sad department: I would love to be able to say that this video represents how Brother and I USED to interact, like when we were bratty little kids, but that would be a lie. This is still pretty much how it goes for us, although I rarely drive him to physical violence anymore.)
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