Keeping It Close To The Vest

The latest outfit mini-uproar I've been causing at work lately, following the whole striped-shirt with plaid pants debacle of a few weeks ago, is regularly sporting a sweater vest. Although it's the first time at this job it's been brought up, this one goes back years and years for me and the ridicule I've encountered.

I've always been completely unapologetic about sweater vests. I think they're baller, and not in a joking sort of way. I'm not wearing them to be ironically funny, like showing up to a party in an old school Starter jacket, or Aviator sunglasses, etc. etc. I'm also not saying I'm above doing that, just not in this instance. (This is where I'm choosing to mention Lane, who is currently showing up to our City League basketball games with striped Zubaz pants and a flat-brim 1992 USA Basketball hat as his warm-ups. Take from that what you will.)

I've loved them since around the time I became diehard about golf (1997) and always enjoyed when the Ryder Cup teams would bust out the matching sweater vests for the competition.

What Rory's vest says to me: "I don't know what you heard about me. But a bitch can't get a dollar outta me." And Lee's vest says: "No Cadillac, no perms, you can't see. That I'm a mutha fuckin' P-I-M-P."


So in the past, because of golf, I had always sported them over top of a polo, being ridiculed the majority of the time. I'd say roughly 65% of girls make fun of me for wearing them, 25% begrudgingly accept them, and 10% legitimately enjoy them. However, over the last couple years, I've also added this little ensemble to my wardrobe, the sweater vest over a longsleeve button-down. It has been met with roughly the same amount of ridicule.

This was the least-douchey picture I could find showing this outfit. You'll have to trust me on that.


But still I stay strong. I will admit defeat on the striped shirt and plaid pants; I thought I could pull that off when clearly I couldn't. I fought the fashion law, and the law won. (Though there were many good jokes at my expense that day, the best comment came from Jenna. I sent a picture to Noles of the stripes and plaid combo after it became an issue, and when he forwarded it to her, she asked him why he would text her a picture of pillows and curtains.) But I will never be sorry for wearing a sweater vest. My Law & Order: SVU is the Sweater Vest Unit.

So. Sweater vests. Thumbs up or thumbs down?