- The USA lost a heartbreaking Ryder Cup to Europe by a single point. The Ryder Cup is my favorite sporting event besides March Madness, so now the depression of not seeing another one for two whole years is setting in. Friggin' Euros have now won 6 of the last 8 Ryder Cups, which coincides perfectly with when I started following golf. It's at Medinah in Chicago in 2012, which means there is a pretty good chance I will be in attendance. (Also, if anyone is unfamiliar with the pressure surrounding this event, watch a clip of Hunter Mahan's chip on 17 in the deciding match. I bet he hasn't done that since he was like 9 years old. Then notice how over an hour later, during the presser, he still was so choked up that he physically couldn't answer questions from reporters, and teammates had to jump in and answer for him. That's why the Ryder Cup is so awesome. I'm still waiting for the year when everybody jumps on the Ryder Cup bandwagon like they did for the World Cup this year. I'm not holding my breath.)
- The Red Sox missed the playoffs for the first time since 2006 (this actually became official a while ago, but the season ended this weekend, so I'm counting it now.) I'm actually pretty proud of the team, to win 89 games with the amount of games the starters missed to injury is absolutely ridiculous. However, no playoffs is no playoffs, and now I have to rely on the Twins again to eliminate the Yankees. ONE TIME, TWINS! ONE TIME.
(One note to my Twins fan friends who talk shit, despite how much I support the Twins- although I like them less and less every year because of people like you: I will trade you payrolls in one second, if it means we can trade divisions too. They forget that the AL East is an arms race, and playing the Yankees, Rays, and Blue Jays 17-19 times apiece, every year, is a tiny bit tougher than the AL Central crapfest. So sorry if our payroll is 161 million. Now go get the Yankees. Do it for all of us.)
- The Titans were televised in Lawrence on Sunday, a rare treat for someone who hasn't splurged on Sunday Ticket yet, but they lost a disappointing game to Denver and dropped to 2-2.
- I had hit the first four games of my five-game parlay on Sunday, and all I needed the Colts to do was win the game outright (not even cover the spread!) and of course Jacksonville kicks a 59-yard field goal as time expires and I lose my chance at $350. Fuck, sometimes I hate gambling. I'm sorry for swearing.
- This isn't really a complaint, since I somehow still managed to win my game with a whopping 57 points, but I'm just throwing this out there: has anyone ever seen somebody win a game with all three of their receivers and tight end getting shut out? Seriously, combined stats for Randy Moss, Santana Moss, Darrius Heyward-Bey (Dwayne Bowe was on a bye) and Owen Daniels: 2 catches, 10 yards. That is ridiculous. Clown shoes.
- The bright spot of my weekend was non-sports related: seeing Vampire Weekend for the first time in Kansas City. Although they're one of my favorite bands, I didn't know how they would translate to a live show- but they were terrific. To quote Paul Rudd in The 40 Year Old Virgin, I always thought they were a bunch of Streisands, but they were really rockin the shit.
- In other news, for the last month, my neck had been mildly sore every couple weeks or so, but nothing I couldn't ignore for a day or two until it went away. Then, one day last week, I woke up and couldn't move my neck or back. Despite my hatred of going to the doctor (my nose is still totally broken from February) I knew it was the only option. Final verdict: 18 vertebrae out of place. If I'm reading the chart right, the human body only has 24. I only went to one semester of med school though, so I could be wrong there. So basically 75% of my back is fucked up (simplifying the fraction 18/24 down to 3/4, and 3 divided by 4 equals .75, little math for you there.) I've been going to a chiropractor every day for a week, with my only goal to be getting it straight before this Saturday, when Lane and I defend our North/South Cup title against Jud and Wing. Pray for a speedy recovery- or just forget this paragraph immediately after reading it, I'm sure it will turn out the same either way.
(You know why Khia sucks? I mean, among other reasons? The title of this post used to be a funny quote from Friday, where the bum falls in the store and threatens to sue the owner for $150,000 but will settle out of court for 20 bucks. Then Khia made that song about licking her in her swimsuit area, and now you can't throw that quote out there without someone thinking you're singing her song. It's awful. It's like Michael Bolton in Office Space. Why should I change? She's the one who sucks.)
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